I am an admitted control freak. I know that many of you out there, while you may be hesitant to admit it, could put yourself in that category as well. I have come to discover that being a control freak isn't always a bad thing-if you exercise the right kind of control.
Many of us waste our time and energy trying to control things that we will never be able to control. You can't control your spouse, kids, boyfriend, friends, parents, or boss anymore than you can control the economy, politics, or the weather. There are so many things in life that we cannot and will not ever have control over.
On the bright side, there are many things that we have sole control over. We can control how we respond to the people in our lives. We can control how much power we give them to impact our lives and our emotions. We can control our preparation for our jobs, our finances, and the weather. Most importantly, we can control the choices that we make which will impact all of these things.
If you feel that your life is spiraling out of control, you're probably right. However, it might be far easier to regain control of your life than you think. Start by asking yourself if you are capable of controlling the things that feel out of control. The answer is probably no. Next, ask yourself what you can control in the situation to enact positive change.
When you begin to take action to regain control of your life, you can begin to make a real difference. Letting go of the things that you cannot possibly control can bring a freedom that you never knew was possible. Choosing to control the things that are within your power can bring unimaginable peace and calm into your life.
Make a choice this week to stop trying to control things that you are unable to control. Instead find those things that you can control and make an effort to focus on those instead. You will be amazed with the results.
Thursday, November 25, 2010
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Strong Finish
It is really easy to start things. I start things all the time: projects around the house, diets, and programs like this to change my life. I am a great starter. But, I am not always a strong finisher.
As you get into the real work of projects around the house, diets, or life changes big or small; thing become more difficult and it isn't always easy to stay committed to the change that you want to make. Things come up, unforeseen circumstances that force us to make a choice; either give up or double down. It is my hope that this time you will decide to double your efforts and stick to it.
Finishing strong requires a lot. It requires flexibility. When things aren't working, you have to be willing to try new solutions to get you to your goal. It requires perseverance. When you just don't feel like doing it anymore, you keep going. Finally, it requires commitment. You must commit to yourself, your girlfriends, and your goals.
Commitment to your girlfriends might be the single most important element in finishing strong. When you have good friends, walking with you and encouraging you to keep going, it makes the work so much easier. Good friends will not let you quit. They will help you to come up with new solutions if the old ones aren't working. They will share their strength and help you to cross that finish line.
You only have a few weeks to go. Band together with your girlfriends and commit to make it a strong finish.
As you get into the real work of projects around the house, diets, or life changes big or small; thing become more difficult and it isn't always easy to stay committed to the change that you want to make. Things come up, unforeseen circumstances that force us to make a choice; either give up or double down. It is my hope that this time you will decide to double your efforts and stick to it.
Finishing strong requires a lot. It requires flexibility. When things aren't working, you have to be willing to try new solutions to get you to your goal. It requires perseverance. When you just don't feel like doing it anymore, you keep going. Finally, it requires commitment. You must commit to yourself, your girlfriends, and your goals.
Commitment to your girlfriends might be the single most important element in finishing strong. When you have good friends, walking with you and encouraging you to keep going, it makes the work so much easier. Good friends will not let you quit. They will help you to come up with new solutions if the old ones aren't working. They will share their strength and help you to cross that finish line.
You only have a few weeks to go. Band together with your girlfriends and commit to make it a strong finish.
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Eliminating Distractions
Last week I spoke about finding peace. I encouraged you to take just five minutes/day, turn off the TV, music, phone, etc. and just be still. Did you try it? Was it hard?
To be honest, I did it but I was unable to do it every day. It is just so hard in this busy world to take a break. This week I want to encourage you to continue to try to find peace, but I want you to expand your idea of what that looks like.
When you settled down to find peace, did you find that a million thoughts went rushing through your head? That's what happened to me. I thought about my to do list, the fight that I had with my husband, the Christmas shopping that I wanted to get a jump start on, and what was going to be on TV that night. I thought about so many things that sometimes it was hard to find any peace at all.
This week I want you to continue to take a break but this time I want you to practice eliminating all of the distractions that race through your mind through a technique called Quiet Mind.
Here is how you do it:
To be honest, I did it but I was unable to do it every day. It is just so hard in this busy world to take a break. This week I want to encourage you to continue to try to find peace, but I want you to expand your idea of what that looks like.
When you settled down to find peace, did you find that a million thoughts went rushing through your head? That's what happened to me. I thought about my to do list, the fight that I had with my husband, the Christmas shopping that I wanted to get a jump start on, and what was going to be on TV that night. I thought about so many things that sometimes it was hard to find any peace at all.
This week I want you to continue to take a break but this time I want you to practice eliminating all of the distractions that race through your mind through a technique called Quiet Mind.
Here is how you do it:
- Find a safe quiet place to rest your mind
- Allow all the thoughts that clutter your mind to come racing through
- Reject each thought one by one until your mind is in a clear, quiet place
- Chose to refocus on one thought
Before you enter Quiet Mind, choose the one thought that you want to focus on. You could focus on a task at work, a relationship, or just focus on being at peace. Whatever you do, force yourself to stay focused on that one thing for at least a minute or two, rejecting all other thoughts that creep back into your thoughts. Once you are finished with your "break" get back to whatever you need to do with a sense of peace and clarity.
Quiet Mind is a tool that you can use at any time to allow yourself to become focused on the task at hand. If you need to focus on work, go to Quiet Mind, focus on what you need to accomplish at work, and then get back to work. When you get home from work, take a moment to go to a quiet mind before you enter the house so that you can leave work behind and focus on time with your family.
Give Quiet Mind a try. I think you will find that it will help you in all that you do.
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Finding Peace
We live in a crazy world. First of all, there are so many things that are beyond our control from elections to earthquakes to global unrest. These daily crises around the world and in our own cities, states, and country have the power to affect us in many ways. Additionally, we are burdened by our daily lives and our personal problems. Whether it is being too busy, not having enough money to pay the bills, being overwhelmed at work, or any number of things that can plague each of us at any given time; we are all under a lot of stress on a regular basis.
It is my belief that one of the best ways to overcome this stress and the feelings of hopelessness that come with it is to take control of your own life. Make decisions to control the things that you can. Be proactive. Join a Girlfriend's Club and commit to making real life change so that you can move forward; allowing yourself to start living the life that you really want rather than the life that you feel stuck with.
While making a commitment to change is a good start, it is often not that easy. Once we make that commitment, we often still feel burdened by all of the same things that have weighed us down for years. The stress builds and it seems impossible to move forward.
This week I want to encourage you to try a simple technique to push aside the stress, allowing you to move forward once again with peace and purpose. It is called Quiet Mind. Part of the problem that we have in focusing on moving forward is that our minds are constantly racing with a million thoughts: I need to send an email at work, I need to go to the grocery store, I need to get new tires for my car, I can't believe that there was another bombing in Iraq today, etc. Our minds are constantly filled and flooded with endless thoughts and worries.
I want you to commit to 5 minutes of peace each day. Go to your car, lie down on your bed, find a quiet spot somewhere and just rest. Don't put on any music, don't bring a book, just allow yourself to be surrounded by the silence. As thoughts rush into your mind, do your best to push them away. Focus on a stream, the mountains, the trees, any image that gives you peace and helps you to feel rest. If 5 minutes seems too long, try 3 or even 1; it isn't that you get 5 minutes/day, it is just that you take time to take a break at least once a day. Just try it and see if it helps.
Next week I will expand on the idea of Quiet Mind. Go in peace and have a wonderful week.
It is my belief that one of the best ways to overcome this stress and the feelings of hopelessness that come with it is to take control of your own life. Make decisions to control the things that you can. Be proactive. Join a Girlfriend's Club and commit to making real life change so that you can move forward; allowing yourself to start living the life that you really want rather than the life that you feel stuck with.
While making a commitment to change is a good start, it is often not that easy. Once we make that commitment, we often still feel burdened by all of the same things that have weighed us down for years. The stress builds and it seems impossible to move forward.
This week I want to encourage you to try a simple technique to push aside the stress, allowing you to move forward once again with peace and purpose. It is called Quiet Mind. Part of the problem that we have in focusing on moving forward is that our minds are constantly racing with a million thoughts: I need to send an email at work, I need to go to the grocery store, I need to get new tires for my car, I can't believe that there was another bombing in Iraq today, etc. Our minds are constantly filled and flooded with endless thoughts and worries.
I want you to commit to 5 minutes of peace each day. Go to your car, lie down on your bed, find a quiet spot somewhere and just rest. Don't put on any music, don't bring a book, just allow yourself to be surrounded by the silence. As thoughts rush into your mind, do your best to push them away. Focus on a stream, the mountains, the trees, any image that gives you peace and helps you to feel rest. If 5 minutes seems too long, try 3 or even 1; it isn't that you get 5 minutes/day, it is just that you take time to take a break at least once a day. Just try it and see if it helps.
Next week I will expand on the idea of Quiet Mind. Go in peace and have a wonderful week.
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