I Can't

"I can't" can be two of the most powerful words that you can utter. "I can't" means that the conversation is over. It means that there will be no further discussions, no new attempts, no Move Forward Solutions. "I can't" is the quickest, easiest way to shut yourself and others down.

When you say "I can't," the first thing that you do is stop others. When you tell them "I can't" there isn't much they can say about it. Sure there are those who will push and prod and force you to see that you really can do whatever it is that you say you can't, but, for the most part, "I can't" is the final word; you won't even try whatever it is that you say you can't do.

The other person that you stop when you say "I can't" is yourself. It stops you from continuing to process. It tells your brain to quit trying. When you say "I can't," whether you really can or not, you tell yourself that you won't so don't waste valuable time and energy on this one.

Today, I would like to encourage you to make a shift in your thinking. Instead of saying "I can't," say "How can I?" "How can I?" keeps the conversation going. It allows you to keep the question open and forces you to continue processing possible solutions. It allows others to enter the conversation with comments, ideas, and suggestions. "How can I?" is full of possibilities.

When you say "How can I?" you can come to many possible solutions. You might find that you really can't do one thing but you can do another. You could discover that while you can't do something now, you can do it later. Finally, you might discover that the reason why you can't do something is simply because you don't want to do it. It is good to recognize and acknowledge what we really do and don't want. Take ownership of those feelings and express them rather than copping out by saying "I can't."

I want to challenge you to eliminate the words "I can't" from your vocabulary. Try to find a better way to express yourself. Own up to it when you don't really want to do something. Allow yourself and others to come up with creative alternative solutions. Whatever you do, stop limiting the possibilities in your life with the belief that you can't.