Don't Worry

This week I was speaking with a friend who is on the cusp of some big things in her life. She got a new job a few months ago but the job is really stressful and she is not sure if she likes it. Now she is getting ready to move into a new apartment. The apartment will eliminate a nearly 2-hour daily commute and will allow her to get more rest, have more free time, and enable her to connect with co-workers and friends much more easily in her spare time (and now she will have almost 10 hours more of that per week). Most of you are probably thinking, "What's the problem?" Well, she is very worried right now. She is worried that the move won't work, she won't feel more rested, and she will just fill up that free time with more work instead of enjoyable activities. She could wind up more miserable than she is now.

We have all been here: on the verge of a big, positive life change that is very scary. Because it is so scary we give into that fear and begin to worry about all of the negative possibilities. The more we worry, the more we ensure that the change will not be good and all of those things that we have built up in our minds may really come true. Have you ever heard of self-fulfilling prophecy? By believing that something can/will happen, we actually make it happen; not because it was going to happen anyway but because we made it happen.

All of us are prone to worry. I worry about many things. However, I try not to end with my fears. I think of the worst case scenario and I process it. In the scenario of my friend, maybe all of the things that she fears will come to pass. If that happens, she will then know that her job is just way too stressful and not a career that she can enjoy long term. At that time, she can begin to think of a career that would be good for her and she can begin to pursue that career instead. She can LifeWalk a career change with me and we can work together to get her into a job that will not be so stressful. But, the move could be the thing that makes a big change for her. It could free up time for her to be able to pursue some things outside of work that bring her great joy and help to relieve that stress from work. With some of that stress eliminated, she could begin to really enjoy her job. That joy could translate to her doing better work. If she does better work she could get a raise or a promotion. Just as there is a possible worst case scenario, there is a potential best case scenario. Reality probably lies somewhere between the two. She just needs to give it time and allow it to reveal itself to her. Only then can she address the issues that actually arise, not just the ones that she imagines.

What are you worried about right now? What aspects can you control and what can't you control? What are your best/worst case scenarios? What would your reaction be to each of these?

Now that you have processed, you just have to live. Time will tell what will happen and when it does, you will be strong enough to get through whatever comes. Just make sure to have one or two good LifeWalking partners in the wings so that you will be ready when the time comes.